Appartment Living and Laundry Debate

The super came yesterday to fix a couple of tiles, of course, I got up and immediately took the washer out of the bathroom and into a bedroom, thankfully I had already taken care of everything and the unit was ready for moving.

The evidence and trail that we have a washer is huge: all of a sudden, the bathroom door opens out instead of in, there is a bench inside it (with a baby bathtub to disguise it), in front of it there is a hanging rack  with diapers, the main bedroom open can show more hanging clothes, including a sheet, there is detergent inside the bathroom and the laundromat boy has not come in several months. The main reason for having called the super is that two tiles fell, most likely due to the vibrations of the spin dryer.

But the super comes, does his job in 10 minutes, and leaves, either clueless or just playing dumb. I hate hiding it, specially since I think we're not doing anything wrong, but for those who wonder why it is forbidden to have washing machines in pre-war apartment buildings, here is the top 5 reasons for the ban:

1. Risk of flooding. Nobody likes getting water from your ceiling. That can happen if your neighbor upstairs has a flood due to a leak in his laundering system. Is it plausible? sure! indeed! It actually happened several years ago to me. I had a big washing machine in the kitchen, perfectly legal, with a place for it and installation and everything. Well, my washer was old and had been fixed before, I had gotten it from a friend that moved out of town. In any case, the risk is high when you have a device which require open faucets for installation and deals with large amounts of water.
   How I deal with it? my machine is not "installed". I fill it up with the shower hose, I never have a full time open faucet. On top of that, it has a limit placed on top, if you overfill, the water will automatically get into the inner tub and down the drain. And since it is lifted, I don't even need the draining pump. Just in case there is a double leak and water starts pouring out of the unit, well, it has less than 1 cubic foot capacity, less than 2 buckets. So that's my very unlikely worst case scenario: a bathroom flooded with the water of a bucket and a half.
2. Sudsy water in your sink or bathtub. Another annoying side effect for your neighbors downstairs. A friend of mine told me he once had a turkey marinating on his neighbors laundry water. Why does this happen? well, old buildings have a very old draining system, with a very limited capability in the water they can take. This flow of liquid can go to a max of 7 gal/min (or something to that effect, please correct me if I make a mistake). Pumping devices in washing machines get the water out at a rate higher than that. The time elapsed from having it full to having it empty and ready for spinning is quite short and the plumbing can't take it. Therefore, the water, having no place to go, gets out in lower apartments from the drain up.
   The solution is to have a buffer tank in which the water can go from the washer, so that it can get into the building's system at its own rate.
   In our case, the draining goes to the bathtub, which works as said buffer, and the water stays there until it can slowly go where it has to. Since it is a small unit, the bathtub is more than enough the size of what is needed.
3. Power capacity. Washers use a lot of juice. A brand new top load Maytag sucks 0.23 KWH per load. My Twin Tub Panda works on 250 W. That times .25  plus another 3 minutos of spin drying at 135 watts is 69WH, less than a third of a regular MayTag, and the equivalent of 3 light bulbs of full capacity for about 15 minutes, not a problem at all. Plus, my building does not have a ban in drying machines, dishwashers or AC, which can suck up much more.
4. Noise. That would be a good argument for newer buildings and hollow materials, but in pre-wars? I dodn't hear my machine from the kitchen, let alone from outside of the apartment, is that good enough? Just need to make sure the spinner is balanced, though.
5. Business arrangements with Laundromats. If there were coin oparated machines in the basement, this argument would be a little valid, not here, nearest place is a couple of blocks away. Since such agreement is not in the lease, I can't believe they would try this one on me, I didn't know I would surrender the freedom to handwash or wash in my spare house and have to patronize a specific partner of my landlord. Really?

So there you have it. I'm not breaking the lease because my machine is not "installed". But I don't think my landlord has the patience to come and look at it, he may just start a fight if he hears "washer", so we will keep hiding it.

My Boy Has Long Hair

I have two beautiful boys: Tiny Guy and Little Guy.

 Little Guy is over 3 now and at this point, mostly out of diapers. He is a very singular one, with things done at his own pace and by his own way.

Due to my husband's beliefs, we didn't cut his hair when he was little, and then, kinda forgot about it. What came out was an amazing straight hair and bangs that he loves waving.

We do have a person that cuts his hair and leaves it long in a boyish fashion, but she lives very far, and due to Tiny Guy's arrival, we have not been able to see her, so Little Guy's hair is really long! We'll give it a cut when we see her, but in the meantime we're just trimming the bangs. We tried someone here and gave him a girl's cut (yuck!)

So, as you may think, I get all kinds of comments, I get the "what a gorgeous hair" and, most of the time the "you SHOULD cut his hair". Combined with the more polite "do you think it would be a good idea to cut his hair?" and my favorite: no comment at all, just a pedantic sign of cutting your hair in front of me in my own house, done to somebody else.

Why don't I do it then? well, by starters, I don't think it's someone else's business what I do with my child's hair. It's, more than our business, his. And let me tell you something, he may be delayed in his speech, but he can comunicate, and he has stated very clearly that he loves his long hair and doesn't want it short.

Moreover, my husband has long hair. My son does not understand that long hair is supposed to be "for girls", he doesn't understand gender issues very well, he knows he is more like Daddy than like me, and Daddy has long hair, so why wouldn't he?

Which brings me to gender issues. I have always stated that I have a boy, but never told him so. I have never told him the difference between boys and girls or showed him specific toys. He sees pink as one more color and does not relate it to girls. He is 3 and learning 2 languages, but he is, in all aspects, a boy.

Whoever says that little children don't know about gender identity have never had one. My little boy has not been exposed to gender related propaganda, yet he likes toy cars, trains, climbing, red, blue, green, Cars (the movie), Thomas the Train, running around, balls, etc. He doesn't care about how he looks and usually picks bright color T-shirts and jeans for outside (and nothing for inside). He climbs what you put in front of him, he is independent and determined. He doesn't care much about dolls, only once in a while he will get a stuffed animal and hug it. So, he has let us know that he is a boy, in every aspect, including the hair.

So, next time you see a child, before looking at the hair, look at what the child does and what the child is wearing and the child's behavior. The other day at a doctor's office, the conversation went like this:

-What a gorgeous boy you have
-Thank you.
 -At first I thought it was a girl, but then I saw the cars and how he was playing and noted that his outfit was definitely boyish.
-I'm glad, people take him for a girl a lot.
 -People just don't think.

So, use your brain for more than half a second. There are several children out there that are not what you pictured in your brain, mine being one of those.

Mother Evolution

I think I mentioned before that I didn't receive any parental support when making the switch. In any rate, it took my mom to actually come and see them for herself. She started by not doing anything in the beginning to being a total pro at the end, so I'm very proud of her. Due to her visit, we went to have dinner to my cousin's place. He was another skeptic one, he kept saying: "too much work". Let me see: when I was using disposables, I was dizzy with the smell, plus changing, going to a toilet, filling it, getting the clothes out with an explosion, soaking them in water, going out to buy them, making 1/2 hour lines in the supermarket to get them before the storm, going to throw them in the building's trash once a day, spending hours online trying to score a good deal because I was running out of them again, filling myself with wipes... Now I change them fast, put them in a bag, throw the bag in the washer every couple of days, fill the tub, put on the timer, leave them, then coming back, draining, filling again (this time with hot water), putting detergent, setting the timer again, coming back later, putting them in the spinner, drain and fill in the mean time, repeating the last process, (draining, spinning and filling) and hanging them. So, I guess maybe we're even. With the difference that I'm not dizzy, my pocket is not dizzy and the kids look awfully cute. Oh, and I don't carry a diaper bag. So, give your mom a try, just make sure your pockets are stuffed before leaving the baby with her.